A hole inside my heart

Hey dude , long time no publish anything :")

just wanna share something to you my online diary , cause i cant tell this stupid secret to anyone ...

Today , i feel so confused . It is because i got lonely, happy , sad feeling at once.

 I start my day with sleeping all day long till 2PM and not doing anything till I check out my bbm and read some bbm from my girls and feeling so touched.

Well, after that i spend my saturday night with my girls, like every teenagers do.
And now I'm home already...

Suddenly i just want to check out my laptop and i found my old Mp3 playlist :")
so I am decided to turn on my Itunes and....

I got this weird feeling. I know that you'll never read this post. but let me issued this feelings.

A hole inside my heart..
I'm all alone

i don't know why all of this songs full of memories. I thought its because i remember the moments we spent together, especially on JHS live in...

stupid me.. i knew that i should take out this feeling asap

do you remember this key words?
" i'm yours"
"birthday"
"9grades"

I tried to forget , I'm laughing with my friends
But I can't stop to keep myself from thinking

Even you'll never know... i just wanna say that you know what i mean.
Thankyou for being a part of the memories of this life especially my life....
I've never thought that i will miss ur stupid joke. :')

thankyou dear..
the sweetest man , sensitive boy , gentleman , and firstlove..

I hope one day you will know a message from a  hole inside my heart...
but you can pretend that you never know anything :") 
I've gotta put you out of my mind,this time.